Niners in Oakland? Are You Nuts??
BY BILL LEEMAN
There was an column in the Chronicle (Matier & Ross 2-24) this week talking about building a football stadium in Oakland that will house both The Raiders and the 49ers.
A stadium in Oakland. Where the 49ers would play.
Yeah. That'll happen. Right about the time they have sukkas in the Vatican.
Apparently, the board that oversees the Oakland Coliseum is looking into this. According to Matier & Ross, they've even authorized a study, for gosh sakes, to the tune of $125,000.
Say, I'll do a study. As a matter of fact, I already have.
Here: How many think this is a good idea?
Let me see a show of hands.
No? No one? Well, I didn't think so.
Maybe if they'd put down their crack pipes for a few minutes, they'd realize that no self-respecting 49ers fan would EVER go to a HOME game in Oakland. Why, the very sound of that is enough to give you the dry-heaves. They'd sooner jump off the bridge on the way over.
I guess this 'board' doesn't understand that San Franciscans, and especially San Francisco sports fans, have always looked with disdain at anything Oakland. You could no sooner get the Niners to play their home games there than you could get them to wear pink chiffon to practices.
Everything about San Francisco screams to Oakland "Get away from me." Oakland has always been the pesky little sister who Mom made us take to the mall. The half-wit cousin no one wants to invite to family gatherings. Don't ask why, it just is. Is it fair? Of course not. But then, neither is life.
Just as the A's have always been the ugly step-sister to the Giants (never mind that they've got four World Series rings, which really ticks me off, but that's a whole 'nother story), the Raiders have always played second fiddle to the Forty-Niners.
Oakland is the brother-in-law that was never really welcomed to the family.
When Gertrude Stein proclaimed there is no "there" there, she was absolutely right. To be fair, there is a "there" there, but apparently someone hid it behind a bookcase many years ago and no one has seen it since.
Did the people responsible for this demented idea think to consult with anyone from the 49ers? I highly doubt it, because they probably didn’t want to take a chance of being slapped. That is, before they were laughed out of the building.
Maybe they could think about some of these facts. That is, after the hallucinogenics wear off.
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