Frontpage Features

BY SCREAMIN' BILL LEEMAN

Well, here we go, now!  Giants versus Phillies for the pennant! 

Wow, and double wow.  

Remember back in June, just after we had gotten rid of Bengie Molina, and the Giants bats were vacationing somewhere off the Bahamas?  Our prospects seemed mighty dim, indeed.  The Giants were done, as far as I was concerned.  If you had told me then that we'd be going up against the Phils in the NLCS, I would have told you to lay off the crack.

But here we are!

Torture?  You better believe it!  

Now, some people are coming to me with questions: "Say, Screamin', why do they call this a season of torture?"

And I tell them:  "It's because every, single, fricking, stinking, drawn-out, excruciating, nail-biter, of a game has been just that."   It seems like every game this season has been decided by one run.   We've been on the edges of our seats all year, screaming, squirming, sweating, and swearing.  I'm telling you, it takes a lot out of you.   We'd lose one, and it was like, "Forget it, we're through.  We were just kidding ourselves..."   And the next day, we win another squeaker, and now we're all giving each other high-fives right back onto the bandwagon.  

But guess what?   All of these torturous and agonizing one-run games are exactly what has made this the THE MOST EXCITING SEASON in San Francisco Giants history!  

And it's not over yet!  

Can we beat the Phillies?  The popular notion is that the Phils are the best team in baseball.  

Are they?  

Maybe.  

Can the Giants beat them?  

Yes.  

Will they?  

We'll see.  

They've got good pitching.  We've got good pitching.  

They've got great hitters.  We've got the baseball gods, and Aubrey Huff's sequined red thong.

Ah, the baseball gods.  They are SO on our side.  Too many things have happened during the course of this season to be coincidental.   The latest example, of course, is Billy Wagner in Atlanta.   He throws a ball and falls in a heap of pain?  Hey!  I don't know who stuck the pin in the Voodoo doll, but it worked.   It didn't start with the safe call on Buster Posey's steal of second, either, and let's hope it doesn't end there.

Yes, the baseball gods are smiling on the Giants.   Maybe it IS because of Aubrey Huff's thong.  The Lucky thong.  The one he wore around the clubhouse after a particularly nasty losing streak to keep the boys loose.  Maybe he's still wearing it.   Maybe they're all wearing one.  

God knows I am.


Here are some fun facts about the Giants - Phillies match-up:  

This will be the first time they've faced each other in post-season play.  

They've split this year's series, each team taking two of three in their own home park.      

Their record against each other since 2000 is 36 - 36.

Roy Halladay lifetime vs the Giants:  0-2, 7.23 ERA.  

Ryan Howard:  Only player to have at least three career home runs off Tim Lincecum.

Jonathan Sanchez is 2 - 0 vs the Phils this year.

But who plays and who sits?   Seems like most of our boys have done something heroic while at the same time booting a play or two.    You just never know.   I have liked Cody Ross since he came here, and liked him even better when in the middle of the champagne-soaked TV interview after the final game of the season, he looked over at his three year old, waved and yelled, "Hi, honey..." 

Who ever would've guessed that it would be his bat that carried us through Atlanta.  

You wanna start the Panda?   Please. 

You know, with all this Panda hoopla, the Panda hats, Panda shirts, and other Panda paraphernalia, and the fact that he has become the darling of the media, it all kind of overshadows the fact that his playing has gone to crap.  We'll need a little more than Voodoo to get around that.

You keep Rowand?   He's from Philly, might be able to do some payback damage.   Trouble is, I think he has already sung his swan song.

Renteria?   Kind of makes me grit my teeth, as does Guillen.

Man!   What do you do?   I've gotta give it to Bruce Bochy.  He's pushed all the right buttons so far.   So, with the help of the aforementioned deities, we'll all be in for some more wonderful torture.

But enough about good luck charms, baseball gods, great pitching, and great teams.   This series could go either way.   These two teams are the best two teams in the National League and are pretty evenly matched.  

The real question is not CAN they beat the Phillies?  

We all know that the Giants CAN win it.  

The real question is:  WILL they beat the Phillies?

The answer:   That's why they play the games.