Frontpage Features

BY SCREAMIN LEEMAN

Have you heard the latest?   Well, listen up, because this one takes the cake.   There are plans in the works for a reality show starring our San Francisco Giants. That is, OUR World Series Champion San Francisco Giants.

Well, if that isn't an idea whose time has come, then I don't know what is.   Besides fried ice cream, that is.

This worries me, and I'll tell you why:

A few of the players think this is a wonderful idea.    As a matter a of fact, some of them are quite excited about it.  

Probably they're too young and naive to realize that the folks putting this on aren't really interested in showing a cohesive clubhouse, where everybody gets along just fine.

No, they're interested in discord, animosity, and spite.   They're interested in arguments, gossip, rumors, and scandal.

Here's a piece of news:  No one watches a reality show where everyone gets along.   Why?  Because it's BORING!   So you better believe that the folks behind this production will present as much pettiness and strife as they possibly can, even if they have to manufacture it.  

ThIs is show biz 2011, folks.

You think this won't be a major distraction?

I can't think of a better way to keep our boys from doing the job at hand, that is, playing winning ball.  

I can't think of a better way to compromise the team chemistry.

I can't think of a better way to undermine their success, and have them wind up in third or fourth place.

I think this is a perfect way to sabotage all the Giants have accomplished as a team.

I, for one, don't need to see Tim Lincecum putting on a bow tie.   And I'm not interested in watching Matt Cain change his socks, or Pablo Sandoval eating a pizza.  I'm not interested in watching the boys play cards, or viewing clubhouse shenanigans of any kind.  

I don't need to see any Giant, for that matter, in any other context except playing ball.   Please.

Whose idea was this, anyway?   And who has the final say?   Does Bruce Bochy have any input?   What about Brian Sabean?  Surely, among all the mature and wise men at the top of this organization, someone or other will put a stop to this folly.  Hopefully cooler heads will prevail.

If not, there goes the dynasty...